Up Up and Awaaaaay!!!!!

Hello peeps,

Well thank god the dreaded BB has ended. At least now I'm only duty bound to stare at the telly once a week for 'Lost'.....

Well, my tv debut was last week, and I know I've said it before but a massive thanks to Kate and Emily for their pearls of wisdom and encouraging words. I was really pleased with how the programme turned out, and I didn't even notice how fat I looked!! Still planning on trying to shed a few pounds before the winter sets in though.

Yipeee, I'm off on my hols on Thursday!! Myself, Jack (my son) and J (the sperm doner) are off to see my folks in the mountains of Crete. Don't worry though, nothing is likely to happen between J and I, I have after all been there, done that and got the babygrow. Seriously though, the question of J and I has been bounced around in my head since we met 8 years ago, and last year I finally stopped seeing him as a sex object, and realised that we are stronger apart than we ever would be together. It is a little strange though when we do things together as a family. For the past 3 years J has accompanied Jack and I on our hols to Crete. I've always thought it's good for Jack to see how we all get along, and I have the added benefit of another responsible parent to help me. This year though I had my doubts about travelling en mass. After all, we are not together are we. Sometimes it's like we're a married couple, but without the love and the sex. And how am I ever going to meet Mr Right, is Mr Wrong is tagging along for the ride. I know I should be grateful to have a super dad for my son, and believe me I am, but sometimes being with J reminds me of how lonely I am. Sometimes I hate being reminded of the fact that he didn't love me, and that we'll never have a future together. Gosh, it sounds like I want a future with him doesn't it. For any shrinks out there reading, I DON'T..... I just want to move on with someone who loves me.... aah!

Anyway, families come in all shapes and sizes don' they. Love mine.

Quote for the day: The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sence..... 'Tom Clancy'

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