Happy New Year

Just wanted to wish everyone a Happy New Year!! I got through Christmas and actually enjoyed it - (Christmas 05 when I found out about my husband and his now girlfriend). Thanks for all your advice, I think I'd come a long way when I started using this site, but I still had issues and you've really helped me. By learning not to focus on my husband and his girlfriend, and to let go, I can now look positively ahead and even though my divorce will come through this year, I see this also as a new beginning. My 6 year old daughter said she's had the best Christmas and New Year ever, so if anyone out there is worried about their kids, separation is upsetting, my daughter cried in the early days wondering when her dad was coming home and I had to tell her that he wasnt - heartbreaking (my son is 20 months now) but by being honest with her and making sure they know they are still loved by both of us, learning to be civil and polite with my ex has helped to build a happy and secure environment for my kids. There are times when I still grit my teeth (my ex sees the kids but don't they seem to have all the freedom - but I can live with that too, I'm lucky to have the kids). Ive been on my own for one year, but I'm finding my feet at last. I'm looking forward to new opportunities for me and the kids. His girlfriend hasn't met the kids yet, but I think I'll be OK. I'll have my low days but my married friends have those too. Just wanted anyone out there who is feeling low, maybe who has just split up and is going through that horrible stage of shock, disbelief and pain, to know things really do improve - in the early days I yearned for the times we'd had together, I really did feel like I had permanent tear tracks on my face, no matter how much I washed it - that everyone could see! - Now I can look back without the pain and look forward as well. It's a slow process, but the more positive blocks I've built, the harder it's been to go back to the negative ones and I've realised my kids are fine as long as we adults behave ourselves.

Categories:

Here’s to us! Fun to be had

You are right , but

Submitted by Pixie on Mon, 2007-01-08 13:08.

You are right , but sometimes , I find it so hard to behave myself because there are times when it is too much even a couple of years down the line . I cope 90% of the time but every now and then it doesn't seem fair. We had a great christmas but it was hard work and this may sound really pathetic but no one said thank you for making it so good , but then hey ho maybe that is true of many mothers regardles of their situation .

Absolutley , it is a slow

Submitted by kate on Wed, 2007-01-03 16:28.

Absolutley , it is a slow process and everyone goes back and forth the whole time ( I myself burst a gasket this christmas !!!!! ) but so long as you move onwards and upwards and as you so rightly say the adults behave themselves then you can do no more. Make sure you have a resolution or a thought just for YOU this new year , but well done .... Top of the class !!!!!!!!