Kate & Emily

Email to friend

Just joined today 30/12 and how interesting! I have been on my own with my 2 children since 2002, though chaotic at times they see there mum once a week. I can relate to everything that has been written, and yes it does get better, though at times with mishaps. I yearned for my children when they were having contact, and would worry a) who will she introduce them to b) will she kidnap them (honestly i did think that) and most importantly are they Ok. One bit of advice is when the children come back dont automatically ask them "well what happened", let them tell you in there own time and in their own way, and i promise they will. Of course my youngest was convinced that we would get back togethor again, and that had to put straight though in the nicest way!. Most of all enjoy yourself when the children are with the absent parent, at first it will be hell, even it means having a good sleep, going for a drive, meeting friends, watching tele, cleaning or having a drink on your own. If you feel that there are genuine problems with the contact then deal with it, but dont do it out of spite. Best thing i did when they dont have contact, is to buy a family railcard (£20 for the year) and visit around the UK, the children love it, much cheaper travel and you make your initial expense normally via the first journey- i dont work for any rail company by the way. If things aren't going well with the absent parent, no doubt the childen will take it out on you ( the parent with whom they live with)keep calm and just think, well who else will they take it on!. Finally stay strong, for you and the children, the children will pick up if they sense a problem and feel that they are to blame Best wishes