Things children of any age need to understand and have a good grasp of follows . You can help them get to grips with these things through thought word and deed and your own behaviour

What has happened and why and what it means to their lives

It is not their fault in any way shape of form

They have not been abandoned

That they are loved and valued

Even though you love the child the divorce is between mother and father

Mum is Mum and Dad is Dad NOTHING can change that

Mum and Dad are their parents and all that that entails
You are still a team

They still have a family it is just a different shape

Mum and Dad are not getting back together .

That they will be in no doubt about what will happen to them at every step

It is not bad to feel upset or sad …lots of empathy

That you appreciate the child s distress and will do all you can to help