A leaflet about mediation produced by Resolution, the Family Law Assoc

Helping couples to reach agreement - How mediation works when families split

Almost always, problems are best solved when people talk. But, sometimes, you need a helping hand.

When relationships break down emotions run high, and talking face-to-face can seem like the hardest thing to do. Sometimes, you need a hand to help get the talking started and focus on what really matters to you. That’s where mediation comes in.

Mediation is a process to help couples who have decided to separate or divorce to talk things through. Mediators are trained to help you reach agreement about how to make the best arrangements for the future. This may be about the way the children are cared for, or how finances will be organised.

Mediation eases the pain of family breakdown because it can:

  • Reduce tension and hostility.
  • Help you make informed decisions that are right for your circumstances.
  • Keep communication channels open.
  • Save the cost of expensive court battles.
  • Help children by showing parents working together to resolve issues.

    What makes Resolution mediators special is that most are also qualified and practising solicitors who understand the law as well as being trained in mediation skills.

    Mediation works like this

  • Mediators give impartial guidance to help you understand what matters to you, and to make your own choices about the best way forward. They will help you reach practical solutions which feel fair for both of you and your family.
  • You will probably have a number of sessions together with the mediator - five or six one or two hour sessions is not uncommon - to help you reach agreement.
  • You can consult your own solicitor at any time, to take partial advice on what is best for you.
  • When you are both content with the decisions you have reached, your proposal is then approved by your solicitor who completes the legal formalities.

    Working together
    Resolution mediators usually mediate alone but can, if you prefer, work in twos. Sometimes the second mediator is also a counsellor, who can provide extra help when emotions run high.

    The right choice for you
    Mediation is especially helpful where couples disagree about the future welfare of their children. Skilled mediators can help couples maintain their focus on what is best for the children, so they are more likely to reach agreement and minimise the pain.

    To find out more
    Mediation plays a vital role in helping families cope with the issues around divorce and separation. More and more families are finding it provides the ideal platform from which to move forward.

    To find out more about how mediation can help you, visit our website www.resolution.org.uk
    On the website you will find a directory of Resolution mediators across England and Wales who are on hand to help.
    You can also contact us at the address below.

    T: 08457 585671 F: 01689 896 972
    E: info@resolution.org.uk W: resolution.org.uk
    PO Box 302, Orpington, Kent BR6 8QX DX 83860 Petts Wood

    Resolution is the trading name of the Solicitors Family Law Association, which is a company limited by guarantee. Company number 05234230.

    Nov 2005

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