Time to dive into the dating game? Feeling rusty and in need of the odd pointer? Here are tips we’ve gleaned from all over the place, we’ve filtered out the ones we wouldn’t dare do (like go on a course to help us attract the perfect partner!!) so here are the ones that we would do, or just made us smile (wait for the bathroom top tip…)
ON INTERNET DATING:
Sell yourself; make the most of your best attributes (eg have grade 2 in the piano)
Be specific about the type of date you’re after (eg must have more than one hobby / topic of conversation)
Look for honesty in the replies, question them on any areas you’d like to make sure of (eg they really aren’t married)
Talk on the phone before you meet – typing, rather than conversation, might be their forte
Don’t give your home address or home phone number until you’re sure they’re genuine (after you’ve met them at least once)
ON THE FIRST DATE
Read the paper before you go so you know what’s going on in the real world and the celebrity world of who’s with who etc. Read about new films out etc in Time Out or the Review section in a paper. You’ll be armed with conversation and feel like you have more to talk about than children.
Start the evening (or say it when you’re making arrangements) that you have an early start the next day (so true with children anyway!) and so you can’t be too late. Oh the joys of having to get back to a babysitter who needs to go home when the date goes sour or just plain dull eh?
No more than 2 drinks (seriously! And that includes the one you had before for Dutch courage!). Anymore and ANYONE will look good
Tell someone where you’re going and make sure it’s a public place.
Be curious about people, ask lots of questions. Listen to the answers!
Dress code girls – it’s legs or cleavage, not the double whammy (or quadruple whammy in this case I suppose). You can’t have both on show apparently.
Don’t moan – you’re out to have fun! In particular keep any stories about your ex or how you came to be divorced / single etc to yourself. It’s amazingly unattractive and kills the phwoar!! Factor.
Don’t wear old grey undies. Even if they’re not going to see them in all their glory, a sneak preview of a grey bra-strap is a no-no
Ladies - don’t suggest a 2nd date as that’s his job. Just say ‘thank you, you’ve had a lovely time’.
Old rules still apply – no monkey business on the first date. Even if its been years….
Now for the bathroom tip… For feng shui enthusiasts you need to strengthen the ‘love corner’ of your home. It’s in the top right hand corner as you come in through the front door. This means it’s my bathroom which is bad news as love is an earth energy but as it’s my bathroom it means there’s water there which equals mud!! Not sounding too romantic, but explains a tremendous amount! I need, for clarity, to introduce some fire (ie red things there to dry it out I assume). Once I’ve done that I’m expecting a complete volte face in my romantic fortunes….
Now back to the sensible stuff, here are more tips but this time from Jennie Hawthorne (88 years old, married for 64 of them and author of ‘Meet Your Match: How to Find and Keep The Man or Woman Who’s Right for You’)
Don’t hibernate, circulate
Slow down on sex, speed up on romance
Advice to young women: learn how to say ‘No’
Advice to young men: Don’t take ‘No’ for an answer. Ask a different question
Think more of yourself: somebody out there is waiting for someone just like you
If you’ve tried dating agencies of any kind, remember everybody has disappointments
Your first love might not be your last or your best
Cast your net wide
Be realistic in your expectations
Love doesn’t have an upper age limit
