Home » Dear Kate & Emily Forum » Community

roller coaster of emotions

Email to friendEmail to friend

I am 16months on from separation. I still live in the family house with 2 children aged 6 and 11. I was very low last year and this year I felt like I was getting back on track. I planned my social life and got back in touch with lots of friends and family which was great. Then I met this bloke and we had a relationship for about 4 months but it ended (his decision) nearly 2 months ago. I was ridiculously upset and down over it and am finding it very difficult to pick myself up again. I don't seem to be able to let go emotionally and be happy with myself again. Am I going round the bend or is this quite a common reaction to have after the break up of a long term marriage ?

single parents in kent ›
Categories:

thank you Kate. I think you

Submitted by Lucy Davies on Tue, 2010-09-07 00:57.

thank you Kate. I think you have hit the nail on the head. Slow and steady wins the race. I did feel all those things. You are a wise bird indeed. I enjoyed having someone to be with rather than always having to plan ahead and invite myself along to things. But I'll get back on my horse and keep going, and do the friendship and enjoyable stuff thing. The rest is too tiring and tricky at the moment.

Hi , this is a totally

Submitted by kate on Mon, 2010-09-06 11:52.

Hi , this is a totally normal reaction I would have thought particularly as this has all happened in a really short period of time maybe the emotions from both break ups  have collided . You may even have felt relief that you had found someone and now you just feel really knocked back and here we go again . So give yourself a break , and slowly but surley take one step at a time and start the proces of getting out and about gently. Do this without thinking about romance , why not give yourself a year off from dating. ring up friends one at a time and start doing things that you enjoy or find interesting . It is hard when this happens and I think particlaurly at your stage when you are still quite recently out of your marriage it is hard to remember that boyfriends come and go and that the level of commitment is different. Give yourslef some time and comfort to build your strength up .

Good luck

Kate