]> http://www.kateandemily.com/taxonomy/term/20,18/0 en http://www.kateandemily.com/node/192 <p>Do you dread the Christmas conversation that seems to start the minute the summer ends? It always seems to start off as a bit of a joke, but turns into a serious question frighteningly quickly. </p> <p>For many people the whole festive season can be problematic beyond belief. The dream of a happy family supported by perfect images grinning out from the adverts, coupled with selective memories from our own childhood, can make a horrible mix. Especially when combined with the guilt that our children may not be experiencing the magic, but instead shattered dreams and painful reminders of last year or the past.</p> Articles New Relationships & Families Co-Parenting The Children Tue, 14 Nov 2006 10:49:52 +0000 http://www.kateandemily.com/node/114 <p>Co-parenting </p> <p>I think in our heart of hearts, whoever did what to whom, when, why or where, we all know that in order for the children to grow into well rounded adults it is a good idea for them to have a relationship with both mother and father. As the adults we have to encourage, make and force it to happen.</p> <p>This section of the site is aimed at creating a workable plan for both parents to buy into so that this can be achieved. </p> <p>HERE'S SOME CLAPTRAP: </p> <li>If we can’t function as a couple we can’t do this <li>If we were able to do this we would not have split up <li>When my spouse left they gave up the right to be part of this family<br /> Articles Co-Parenting Sun, 4 Jun 2006 21:19:55 +0000 http://www.kateandemily.com/node/40 <p>Here we help you to overcome some of the hurdles to putting this into practice. We know it takes a mammoth effort, and smacks of being far to good to be true. It’s not though, you can have a relationship with your ex that is far from functioning and still get something useful out of doing this’</p> <p>IDENTIFY PROBLEMS<br /> Clearly what we have explained so far is not rocket science. Hopefully by explaining the rationale behind the thought and showing very clear pay offs for you and your children we have made it something you would like to work towards.</p> <p>But we have heard time and time again….</p> Articles Co-Parenting Sat, 25 Feb 2006 15:29:13 +0000 http://www.kateandemily.com/node/39 <li>Organise a schedule of who’s going where way in advance and put it up for all to see. <li>Plan your visits. <li>Make visits meaningful, with time for parent and children to be alone together to talk etc.. <li>Make sure that visits are not all about entertaining them but about being a parent too e.g. do homework and, for example, as they get older let them bring a friend. <li>Talk about your child’s life with the other parent, but beware of crossing the line between healthy interest and cross-examination! <li>Spend some time at hand-over with the other parent to ease transition, preferably to discuss accomplishments or worries that you can both share or work on. If it's still very hard then have another adult present to make sure that everyone behaves like grown-ups and to reduce the tension.<br /> Articles Co-Parenting The Children Sat, 25 Feb 2006 15:23:51 +0000 http://www.kateandemily.com/node/38 <p>Children love their Mum and Dad, so look at the relationships from their perspective. It really doesn’t matter who did what to whom. </p> <p>The adjustment of the parents and how they treat each other are amongst the most important factors in how children experience divorce.</p> <p>The benefits to the children of developing a good co-operative relationship with their other parent can be enormous and the negative effects of not behaving in a civil way far-reaching.</p> <p>At some level work towards mending or reforming your relationship with the other parent. Remember it is it is vital for fostering good practise at home and for parenting your children.</p> Articles Co-Parenting Sat, 25 Feb 2006 15:21:10 +0000 http://www.kateandemily.com/node/37 <p>Come on where's your pride? We all knwo this is a horrid, low and destructive way to behave. It's hard not to, so reading this might just give elp you to get a grip of your moral fibre and rise above such skullduggery (if that's how you spell it?!)</p> <p>HOW CHILDREN ARE USED AS AMMUNITION </p> <li>Hijacking their important events <li>Training them to take sides <li>Putting them in the middle <li>Using them as a confidant <li>Burdening them with adult problems <li>Exposing them to conflict <li>Taking away the carefree, innocence that children have a right to <p>WHY DOES IT HAPPEN? </p> <li>To demonstrate the negative consequence of action you don’t like<br /> Articles Co-Parenting Sat, 25 Feb 2006 15:17:36 +0000 http://www.kateandemily.com/node/21 <p>India Knight now there is a lady I would like to be friends with her book on shopping is stuffed full of retail morsels. However, I first got to know her when reading the amazingly poignant though deeply distressing book by Ruth Picardie “ Before I say goodbye� Am loathe to recommend this book as the last person I did stayed up all night reading it weeping and most certainly did not thank me for the experience. Anyhow India and Ruth were friends and by the time I had finished the book I believed that she was my friend too. The wheels came off India’s bus and she separated from her husband with 2 small children and then wrote the very very funny life on a plate which I most certainly would recommend followed by her single parent themed offering Don’t you want me?</p> Articles Co-Parenting Tue, 22 Nov 2005 10:02:51 +0000