The funny thing about family meetings is that although they sound ghastly they really can get the gang communicating better, improve talking and listening , help problem solve and more. So surely it has to be worth a go?

It may seem odd to apply a communication idea more closely associated with the boardroom, but there is no reason why families shouldn’t have meetings too. The very concept of a meeting smacks of the work place and although such comparisons feel inappropriate any team will work better if they have effective ways of communicating, rewards and consequences, goals and so on.

Do you dread the Christmas conversation that seems to start the minute the summer ends? It always seems to start off as a bit of a joke, but turns into a serious question frighteningly quickly.

For many people the whole festive season can be problematic beyond belief. The dream of a happy family supported by perfect images grinning out from the adverts, coupled with selective memories from our own childhood, can make a horrible mix. Especially when combined with the guilt that our children may not be experiencing the magic, but instead shattered dreams and painful reminders of last year or the past.

Here are a couple of ideas of things to do with your children that will help generate even more ideas of fun you can all have together in the future.

A FAMILY LIST OF FUN THINGS TO DO
Sit down with the children and make a list of all the adventures you’d like to go on and the fun things you’d like to do.

Use these categories and write down everyone’s ideas under each:

You take on new children, but you also take on an ex-spouse. How have others managed these grown-up relationships? Read on….

‘When you marry a man who has been married before – and there’s children involved from that marriage, his first wife’s never going to go away. I reconciled myself to that fact very early on in our relationship. One of the most difficult areas to navigate with regards to divorce has got to be the social fall-out that happens afterwards. We do still see some people who are friends with his ex-wife too. Then there are certain boundaries that need to be built and which you don’t go beyond. I’ll only talk about things that his ex knows about – I don’t want them to feel compromised next time they’re with her.’

• The journey of a 1,000 miles often begins with a broken fan belt and a flat tyre
• And on the other hand, there are different fingers !!!!!! How true old girl!!!
• 'Never squat on your spurs' a Texan proverb to put in your pipe!

Whilst a new relationship may be fantastic for you, the depressing statistics for the failure of new relationships where children are involved suggest that you need to tread carefully and gently to give the relationship the chance it deserves. Let’s face it, your children would probably prefer that you remain totally focussed on them forever and ever, but you know that you need to move on and introduce new people into yours and the children's lives. We hope to offer some pointers to help the process, and also some reminders to bear in mind that there is a balancing act between looking after the children, your, and your new partner. Remember: be patient, consistent, supportive, and don’t forget that love is not a competition for the number one slot in your life. Your children are your children, and your lover is your lover very easy to say, but it may not seem that easy to either of these people!